So this aircraft crashed headlong into a(Pikey) gypsy encampment killing a few of its occupants, later that day in heaven there was a knock on the pearly gates and when St Peter answered there stood about 15 or 16 of the gypsies. Can we come in said one, to which St Peter thought a moment and said "I think I had better check with god" and off he went, and said to god"i've about 16 gypsies outside at the pearly gates asking to come in what will I say" "blimey" said god "thats an awful lot to let in at once at this time of day just let in a dozen for now , let them decide for them selves which ones come in. So back to the gates went St Peter, when he arrived they were gone, so back to god he rushed shouting"they're gone they're gone my goodness they're all gone"Calm down calm down" says god "what do you mean they're all gone what all 16 of them""yes yes" says St Peter and the gates too.
A little girl goes to the barbers with her father one day,while watching him getting his cut she is eating a large cream bun and getting a little close to the barbers chair, so, he turns to her and says "sweetheart your gonna get hair on your muffin"to which she quickly replies" yes I know and I'm gonna get boobs too".
One day the junior school teacher is telling the smaller children the age old story of Chicken Licken,she comes to the part where chicken licken tries to warn the farmer and so, she reads chicken licken went up to the farmer and says the sky is falling the sky is falling, the teacher then pauses looking around asking who knows what the farmer said? a little girl in the corner raised her hand saying "I think he probably said Holy shit a talking chicken, for the next 10 minutes the teacher was unable to teach.