Well i never!!!

Hi, Last Autumn Sue and i decided to go to a local bike club (Taw & Torridge VJMC) show at "Atlantic Village" Bideford, N Devon.We have a young friend Scott who is a member of both this club and our own CX-GL MCC club, he was the person that told us about this show. We arrived on our bikes at around 11am and had a walk around some really nice bikes and a natter to a few of their owners. While there we had a cuppa with Scott then walked around the shopping area for a couple of hours.Before leaving we popped back to the show area to say cheerio to them all. There was a chap walking around taking pictures with a nice looking Camera, so Sue started to chat to him, it turned out he was a reporter/columnist in the local Bideford newspaper.Then it was time to go as we had nearly 40 miles to go back to the Caravan.Back at the bikes as we started putting on our protective clothing, helmets etc the reporter approached us again, this time admiring our bikes and chatting to us about them. After 10 miutes or so he left us and we drove off. Several weeks later Scott got in touch with us saying that we had appeared in an article in his local (Bideford) newspaper.
This is the article as it appeared.
Click on the picture to enlarge it.(to make it even bigger click again)

This article isn't exactly as told to him but then what newspaper article is actually 100% accurate.Also he didn't make notes so it was from memory.
These were our bikes as of October 2012.

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Joke of the day.

Modern version of a famous historic event

Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."

Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."

Nelson: "Hold on, this isn't what I dictated to Flags. What's the meaning of this?"

Hardy: "Sorry sir?"

Nelson (reading aloud): " England expects every person to do his or her duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious persuasion or disability. 'What gobbledygook is this for God's sake?"

Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunities employer now. We had the devil's own job getting ' England ' past the censors, lest it be considered racist."

Nelson: "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."

Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have now been designated smoke-free working environments."

Nelson: "In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the main brace to steel the men before battle."

Hardy: "The rum ration has been abolished, Admiral. It's part of the Government's policy on binge drinking."

Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it, full speed ahead."

Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed limit in this stretch of water. It's an environment protection initiative."

Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle in history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's nest, please."

Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."

Nelson: "What?"

Hardy: "Health and Safety have closed the crow's nest, Sir. No harness; and they said that rope ladders don't meet regulations. They won't let anyone up there until proper scaffolding can be erected."

Nelson: "Then get me the ship's carpenter without delay, Hardy."

Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair access to the foredeck Admiral."

Nelson: "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."

Hardy: "Anti-discrimination requirements, sir. We have to provide a barrier-free environment for the differently abled....."

Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of Admiral by playing the disability card."

Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The Royal Navy is under-represented in the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."

Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full sail. The salt spray beckons."

Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety won't let the crew up the rigging without hard hats. And they don't want anyone breathing in too much salt; haven't you seen the adverts?"

Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the cannon and tell the men to stand by to engage the enemy."

Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."

Nelson: "What? This is mutiny!"

Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There are a couple of legal-aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."

Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the Frenchies and the Spanish?"

Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."

Nelson: "We're not?"

Hardy: "No, sir. The French and the Spanish are our European partners now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, we shouldn't even be in this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for compensation."

Nelson: "But you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil."

Hardy: "I wouldn't let the ship's diversity coordinator hear you saying that sir. You'll be up on disciplinary report."

Nelson: "You must consider every man an enemy who speaks ill of your King."

Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your life."

Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety again! Whatever happened to rum, sodomy and the lash?"

Hardy: ""As I explained, sir, rum is off the menu! And there's a ban on corporal punishment."

Nelson: "What about sodomy?"

Hardy: "I believe that is now legal, sir." 

Nelson: "In that case. kiss me, Hardy."

None for us.

Hi, Well it seems just about everyone else has had more than there share of Snow but.......not us here in Teignmouth. On Tuesday night at around 10 pm it started snowing very heavily (first time for us)and at around 12.30am it had started to settle well, In the morning around 8am i woke and looked out of the bedroom window, lo and behold Rain, heavy Rain, no Snow anywhere in sight. later in the day we decided to try a bit of shopping at our new Morrisons store (quite impressed) on the way we could see on the very top of the hills above Shaldon, a little snow. Later going toward Newton we culd see Dartmoor was covered (8 miles from us as the Crow flies) all over. Well anyone who knows Sue will tell she is a Snow addict, like Bees to Honey, so of course i had to take her up.It would also hopefully allow us to get to Dartmeet to feed the Birds at the Bird tables there, i wouldn't think anyone else would have been therein that lot. The Weather at home when we left was 3c so i new the Moors (over 2,000 ft higher) would be a lot different. Normally i would probably not have risked it but i recently bought myself a couple of Winter helpers.A set of Snow Socks (Asda direct £35) they get cracking reports and supposedly improve grip over ordinary tyres by at least 300%.They fit around the Tyres/Wheels with elasticated bands and are supposed to be fitable in under 5 minutes the pair. Also i bought 2 aerosol tins of Ice grip Spay, again its supposed to improve grip with just a few sprays of the tyres for a get of Jail if stuck.At around 11am off we went.
 Here we are about 2 miles onto the moors, the main roads are'nt to bad but the smaller roads are still dodgy,Temp 1c now.
Please Click on any picture to enlarge it.

We are now almost on the top near Haytor, and the main road is fine, reasonably clear although the Temperature has now dropped to 0c

We reached Dartmeet and the Car park was very icy, we were the only car there.So we fed our Birds, all the feeders and trays were empty so i think they were glad to see us.Within 5-6 mins we had about 10 Long Tailed Tits, 5 Chaffinches, 4 great Tits, 5-6 Nuthatches + Blue Tits, Coal Tits, Marsh Tits and Blackbirds all viaing for the food (there was loads there.
These are the Bird tables we built, there are 3 plus Fatball feeders.
The second picture shows a family of Long Tailed Tits (pctures through Windscreen)

 This picture is of our friendly Great Spotted Wodpecker, he usualy goes to the fatball feeder but today he was feeding on seeds and Suet pellets we scattered on the floor, mainly for the Yellowhammers, Chaffinches,  Robins, Dunnocks..

On the way home we passed several Dartmoor Ponies that were rooting in the snow and eating tree shoots.

Joke of the day.

man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of an airplane.

The woman sniffed, sneezed, took out a tissue, gently wiped her nose, then visibly shuddered for ten or fifteen seconds.

The man went back to reading his book.  A few minutes later, the woman sniffed and sneezed again, took a tissue, wiped her nose, then shuddered violently once more.

Although assuming the woman might have a cold, the man was still curious about the shuddering.

A few minutes passed when it happened yet again. As before she took a tissue, wiped her nose, her body shaking even more than before.

Unable to restrain his curiosity, the man turned to the woman and said, "I couldn't help but notice that you have sniffed and sneezed three times, wiped your nose, and then shuddered violently. Are you okay?"

The woman replied, "I am sorry if I disturbed you. I have a rare medical condition. Whenever I sneeze, I have an orgasm."

The man, more than a bit embarrassed, was still curious. "I have never heard of that condition before," he said. "Are you taking anything for it?"

The woman nodded. "Snuff."

Our Diet

Hi all, Not had many peeping at my last post but hey i was gone a long time.
To bring you up to date.
We (Sue and I) have been slowly losing weight now for around 5 years. My max weight was a staggering 23st 12lbs, Sue started at 12st 10lbs. Up until just before Christmas i was down to 17st 3ilbs and Sue at 10st 10lbs, which we were quite pleased with (so was my Dr) Over the festive season we both managed to put on around 6-7 lbs which has got to go again.
Our Diet over the last 9 months or so has been quite easy to stick to and was as follows.
Morning breakfast, No added Sugar Muesli with a little sweetner for me and Soya milk, with mashed Banana for Sue.(Occasionally Porridge)
Lunch/Dinner/midday meal - Consisted of Homemade Soup and a slice of Multigrain Bread, followed by a piece of Fruit
Evening meal was/is any meal that was reasonably low in fat with lots of Vegeatables when possible.For a change a Salad or Homemade Chicken Curriy and Basmati Rice.
Sugar free Jelly with added Fruit, or Milk Pudding with Sweetner and Skimmed Milk, or Stewed Fruit ie Apple, Rhubarb, Plums etc with Sweetner and Low Fat/Sugar fake Cream, or Low Fat, no added Sugar Yogurt (Irish)
Some evenings we would succumb to a couple of Multigrain Ryvita's with Cows Extra light cheese spread.
This diet was on a alternative day menu which was all soup mid and evening one day then back to the above on the next. Any extra's were as low Fat as poss, which included the Alternative frying oil Flora Quisine (very low in Saturates) low fat Marge, Decafe Tea,No Sugar etc.

Tomato Soup recipe
1 to1.5 lb (500gr to ikg) large ripe Tomatoes sliced
3 Large Onions, finely chopped,
1/2 a Red Pepper (we prefer the sweet type) chopped.
3-4 cloves of Garlic chopped.
approx 1 tbsp Flora Quisine
4 (Tesco) Tomato Pasata's (32p ish)
I low salt Chicken Oxo cube
2  "  "   "  " Vegeatable "  "
1X 3" to 4" inch long piece of Tomato Pure (from tube)
1 Lge (Old) Potato chopped roughly
4-6 button Mushrooms, roughly chopped..
Salt & Pepper to taste  (you could add a few Herbs if liked)
We add a pkt Tesco Alpro Soya single Cream (250gr) you could add full Cream Milk or Cream.
Add Water to thickness required
You will need a Lge pan here (ours in 3 Litre)
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Method
Place Onion and Garlic in a pan with the Flora, fry until soft and going clear. Add the Pepper fry for a further 3-4 mins. Add all the other ingredients and bring to the boil, then simmer for 30 40 mins until all are tender finally adding Soya milk or Substitite.
Put everthing into a Blender a little at a time, serve and enjoy. this will probably make enough for 6-8 people.
We put 2 person portions into plastic containers and Freeze them for future use.

Joke of the day.

After nearly 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the wife felt her husband, begin to massage her in ways he hadn't in quite some time.

It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then caressed her shoulders and neck, slowly worked his hand down, stopping just over her stomach.

He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, working down her side, passing gently over her buttock and down her leg to her calf.

Then, he proceeded up her thigh, stopping just at the uppermost portion of her leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then suddenly stopped, rolled over and became silent.

As she had become quite aroused by this caressing, she asked in a loving voice, 'Honey, that was wonderful. Why did you stop?'

To which he responded: 'I found the remote.'

Back for a moan.

Hi all, This has been a very long time coming but i feel its time i posted for several reasons.
The first is that the comments section on my last set of posts are being used as a chat room (I think). I'm not really sure because its either foreign or in code. When i i contacted blogger about it they said "That's easily solved, enable the section making the commenter use an identity before posting" well as a lot of you know i have always been against that sort of thing and i wont comment on blogs that ask you to do this.
My own Current PET hate is the use of Blasted Mobile Phones every where.The younger generation are probably most guilty of this but it certainly isn't exclusive to that age bracket.They are used in just about every place in today's society, i have seen/heard them used in Buses,Trains,Taxi's,Pubs, Restaurants,on Beaches, in Public parks, and the Doctors Surgeries and Hospitals, even though there are signs up asking you to "Turn them off".while in these.The pub on New Years Eve was awful with them going off every minute. When you looked around the place people every where were peering into there laps with Thumbs going like fiddlers elbows.I think probably the final straw for me was after consuming 4 pints of Diet Coke and 1 pint of Lager i needed to get rid of some of it. On entering the Gents i headed toward the urinals,i stopped dead,Lo and behold someone sitting in one of the cubicles was laughing and holding a real conversation while about there ablutions, i just couldn't believe it.As far as i'm concerned the best place for them is in the little room, flushed away.I just can't understand why no one can say "I will call you back later"
Personally i have one that i have owned for 8 years, i bring it in the house to charge to or three times a year. It is for use in Emergencies ONLY, ie i take it fishing, just in case (my heart complaint etc) As far as i know hasn't got aps? or anything else,its 51/2" long and fat so i can hold it and dial too!!!! perfect.
OK probably enough (My grand kids would certainly say it is)
Here then are a few pictures from our new years eve outing (i hope)